Today was as perfect as it gets. I woke up with Bo shoving a handmade card in my face with a sweet drawing of our family surrounded by hearts and dinosaur scales. Not sure about the significance of the latter, but she was proud all the same.
Then breakfast at Chaps. Grocery shopping (I'm sure some people wouldn't think of that as a treat, but when I get to do it alone, it's a pleasure). Gardening. Dinner at home--burgers and champagne. The smell of lighter fluid in the neighborhood. And a long run in the evening sunshine listening to P!nk.
(I'm a few months behind on pop culture--at least. Did you all see her performance at the Grammies this year? It just came to my attention the other day. Holy sha-zam! That woman makes me want to run a marathon.)
When I wasn't making plans to become a rock star and get tattoos, I kept thinking about what a privilege it is to be a mom.
I watched this video from Stephanie Nielson the other day. I'm sure you all know Stephanie, her blog and her story. If I try to re-tell it here, I'll just crumple up into a puddle of tears. Tears of sadness for what she has endured. Tears of joy for the inspiration she provides.
Stephanie's video is about her faith. She's Mormon, and she draws on her faith for strength.
(FYI, I'm not Mormon. You can read more about my difficult-to-label religion here.)
Stephanie's message about motherhood being a privilege really touched me. At one point in the video, she talked about how it's difficult sometimes to cope with wanting to look and feel beautiful again. But then later she concludes that motherhood and beauty are one in the same. Waking up each day, making her kids' lunches for school and watching them ride bikes down the street are all privileges she almost lost. My heart breaks that she has had to sacrifice so much to teach me that.
I thought a lot today about friends who aren't celebrating Mother's Day today or are celebrating it differently. Friends who haven't been able to conceive. Friends--fantastic, wonderful friends--who have yet to find love. Friends who have one child but have been longing to have another, and their bodies won't cooperate. Two family members--both of whom have four wonderful children each--but who I'm sure thought today about the babies they delivered and never got to take home from the hospital.
What I would do to fix all of that for my friends who are and would be amazing moms.
Motherhood is hard work. It's messy and loud and I screw it up all the time. But it is a privilege. And it is beautiful.
2005:
2007:
Oh Megan, your post made me cry. Thanks for reminding me about the privilege. It's easy for it to sometimes get lost among the dishes and washing and constant demands. I'm not sure if I can bear to click on your link to Stephanie Nielson. I might wait for a day of particular intestinal fortitude. In the meantime, thanks for the honesty you put into every post. Can't tell you how it resonates and I wish I had the courage to do the same.
Posted by: twirling betty | May 10, 2010 at 05:53 AM
Oh, wow, thanks so much, T.B. I'm sorry to make you cry! I get lost in the dishes/demands, too. I love being part of a blogosphere where other mommies can lift me up just when I need it (or make me laugh on days when I'm in the mood to read about the ridiculous side of motherhood).
As for the honesty, I don't know how else to be. I've always been an open book (much to my mother and husband's horror, at times). I'm pretty sure I lose readers whenever the religion thing comes up, which is too bad. I have such a deep respect and interest in all faiths (well, almost all. There's some wacky stuff out there). My hope is that we can all learn from and accept each other.
Thanks so much for your kind note.
Posted by: Megan | May 10, 2010 at 01:43 PM
Thank you so much for this! My husband and I are going on year #4 of trying to conceive and it can be very discouraging at times. I learned just this year to say "Thank you God for the gift of infertility because it has taught me the value of having a family." Its nice to know that people don't take those precious babies for granted!
Posted by: Randi Dickinson | May 10, 2010 at 10:40 PM
Oh, Randi. I'm so sorry. You are my hero for finding a way to be thankful for what must be heartbreaking and extremely frustrating. I wish you and your husband the best.
Posted by: Megan | May 11, 2010 at 12:57 AM
Sweet, sweet post Mimi... and it is *such* a privilege that we are allowed the joys and the agonies of these girls we have. I love the photos of the bean and the peanut. :)
xoxo and Happy Mother's Day a bit late!
Posted by: Nis | May 11, 2010 at 11:24 AM
Beautiful and true! Thanks for sharing, I had to work hard to concieve and carry my three little ones and thanked them on Mother's Day for being the reason I'm a mom. I'm blessed!
Happy Mother's Day, Megan.
Posted by: Hollie Eastman | May 11, 2010 at 05:26 PM
Megan I just tuned into your blog today for the first time in a while. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for remembering Gabriella. Mothers' Day for me always includes a trip to the cemetary, quiet and peaceful, just her and I. God gave me 4 great kids and one angel, I am blessed. Love u. Dena
Posted by: Dena | May 20, 2010 at 11:12 PM