penny carnival

The privilege of motherhood

Today was as perfect as it gets. I woke up with Bo shoving a handmade card in my face with a sweet drawing of our family surrounded by hearts and dinosaur scales. Not sure about the significance of the latter, but she was proud all the same.

Then breakfast at Chaps. Grocery shopping (I'm sure some people wouldn't think of that as a treat, but when I get to do it alone, it's a pleasure). Gardening. Dinner at home--burgers and champagne. The smell of lighter fluid in the neighborhood. And a long run in the evening sunshine listening to P!nk.

(I'm a few months behind on pop culture--at least. Did you all see her performance at the Grammies this year? It just came to my attention the other day. Holy sha-zam! That woman makes me want to run a marathon.)

When I wasn't making plans to become a rock star and get tattoos, I kept thinking about what a privilege it is to be a mom. 

I watched this video from Stephanie Nielson the other day. I'm sure you all know Stephanie, her blog and her story. If I try to re-tell it here, I'll just crumple up into a puddle of tears. Tears of sadness for what she has endured. Tears of joy for the inspiration she provides.

Stephanie's video is about her faith. She's Mormon, and she draws on her faith for strength. 

(FYI, I'm not Mormon. You can read more about my difficult-to-label religion here.)

Stephanie's message about motherhood being a privilege really touched me. At one point in the video, she talked about how it's difficult sometimes to cope with wanting to look and feel beautiful again. But then later she concludes that motherhood and beauty are one in the same. Waking up each day, making her kids' lunches for school and watching them ride bikes down the street are all privileges she almost lost. My heart breaks that she has had to sacrifice so much to teach me that. 

I thought a lot today about friends who aren't celebrating Mother's Day today or are celebrating it differently. Friends who haven't been able to conceive. Friends--fantastic, wonderful friends--who have yet to find love. Friends who have one child but have been longing to have another, and their bodies won't cooperate. Two family members--both of whom have four wonderful children each--but who I'm sure thought today about the babies they delivered and never got to take home from the hospital.

What I would do to fix all of that for my friends who are and would be amazing moms. 

Motherhood is hard work. It's messy and loud and I screw it up all the time. But it is a privilege. And it is beautiful.

2005:

2007:

  

A chores chart. Finally.

The projects I love to make most are the ones that solve a problem around our house. Like the book slings. Choosing a book was taking too long at night because Bo couldn't recognize her books by their spines. Once I figured out a way to face them forward--without the use of my nonexistent carpentry skills--the bedtime story routine went more smoothly.

So, finally, we now have a chores chart. This thing has been a long time comin'. I couldn't for the life of me figure out a design that I thought would work for us. I didn't want a set list of chores running down one side because some days they need to wash the dishes and some days they don't. I needed more flexibility.

When I saw this chores chart from Jessica over at Balancing Everything, I knew I had my answer: fabric pockets that would hold cards with tasks I needed the girls to do.

This is what I created.

That's a "B" and an "M" on the left, by the way. The girls' first initials. I should have used a darker fabric for that. And, actually, both their names happen to have six letters so I could have appliqued their full names with one letter on each pocket, but I was trying to get this done during one episode of Yo Gabba Gabba. 

I printed the cards on cardstock, and I'm in the process of drawing pictures on each one so the girls understand what I'm asking them to do.

As Bo and her birdie demonstrate here, once their task is done, they flip the card over to the back side, where there's a checkmark (drawn by me; colored by Bo). 

I'm sure the thrill will wear off soon enough, but so far the girls have been racing to get their chores done so they can turn their cards over. Naturally, Bo (being almost 5) is more on board than Magpie (who's 2 1/2). In fact, last night big sister did a couple of little sister's chores just so she could flip more cards over.

Now I need a little card for myself that says "make a chores chart" so I can flip it over to the checkmark side.

I have to share this story about Bo from yesterday. I don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but she was born early and small. Perfectly healthy and not super early (3 weeks) and not super small (4 1/2 pounds), but still--I've always felt like she was catching up a bit.

That has made the decision to send her to kindergarten next year tough. She has a summer birthday, so she'll be young anyway. Academically, I think she'll do great, but there are just times when she has meltdowns we thought would sort of be gone by now, you know?

So yesterday our neighbor was visiting. Bo decided to show her how she knows how to skip now (it's really more of a gallop, but that's beside the point). A few beats into the skipping, Bo tripped, fell and skinned her knee. For the next 10 minutes, she was sobbing on my lap. I could tell, though, that she was more embarrassed than physically hurt.

Once she calmed down, she went to the garage, took out an old chalkboard and on her own drew two pictures on it--a happy person and a sad person:

I realize they both look happy there (and with giant bellybuttons), but that's how she explained it to me. She wanted to show how at first she was sad and now she is happy. I guess my point is that maybe kids are more emotionally advanced than we think. There are plenty of times when I should have drawn a picture of a sad or mad face instead of throwing wet rags across the kitchen. Kindergarten, here we come.

And one last thing today: A reader named Angela Chevalier sent me photos of the three book slings she made for her daughter's nursery:

Get out of town, huh? Total cuteness. I love the alphabet addition and am so impressed by how straight she got the letters. And check out the cute matching book bags on the floor. Thanks for sharing, Angela! 

    

Flannel nightgowns and kissing hands

Back in November or so, when it was really cold, I promised the girls I'd sew them flannel nightgowns. Now that it's April, and still cold at night but not November cold, I finally got it done.

One for Magpie ... (Photo by Bo:)

 
 And one for Bo:

Of course, she tested the twirl factor right away. And, yes, that left sleeve is bigger than the right. I've never been a perfectionist.

I started making the nightgowns following Butterick 6659, but please. The instructions for the sleeves and other trim details were ridiculous, so I only used the pattern for the main shape of the dresses.

And still they came out too big, so I tucked the fabric under a bit and sewed little darts, attempting to channel this dress by Spokane kids' clothes maker Chris Mark. (Check out more of Chris' cute stuff in her Etsy shop.)

 

Bo had picked out the fabric--Amy Butler Tumble Roses flannel in pink from her Love line--at Buttercuppity the other day.

The girls are pleased as peaches with their nighties. I don't have the heart to tell them the forecast calls for 70+ degrees this week.

Do you all know that book, The Kissing Hand, by Audrey Penn? Our school district included it in Bo's kindergarten registration packet. It's about a little raccoon named Chester who's afraid to go to the first day of school, so his mom kisses his hand and tells him that whenever he's feeling unsure, he should just put the "kissing hand" to his cheek and he'll feel his mama's love. I'm going to spoil the ending for you, but basically Chester decides that his mom needs a kissing hand, too. Yeah, I didn't quite make it through without my voice cracking the first time.

Even though the book was meant for Bo, Magpie has taken quite a liking to it. She's been carrying it around the house all week and kissing my hand in the sweetest, most I've-completely-forgotten-about-that-temper-tantrum-you-threw-20-minutes-ago way.

The last page of the book shows you how to say "I love you" in sign language. Here's Magpie attempting it on my lap this morning:

I've heard people say that "the days are long but the years are short" when you have young kids. Sometimes that phrase gets me through a rough moment. This morning could have stretched out a little longer, though. I wouldn't have minded at all.

12 Days of Crafting, Days 7 and 8: candle crown and countdown blocks

I just posted Day 8's craft for my 12 Days of Crafting project over at Dwell Well.

Today, we made a Santa Lucia crown from felt:

 

 You can see the tutorial, more photos and an explanation of what in the world a Santa Lucia crown is right here.

Day 7 was a project from my sister-in-law, Kim: countdown to Christmas blocks.

Cute, huh?

Four more crafts to go.

We are knee deep in Christmas here. Party for J's side of the family was last night. Great fun. His family is very musical, so at one point we were all sitting around the piano singing Christmas songs (and then Beatles songs and then Elton John songs). It was beautiful.

 

Today we went to Spokane's annual Gingerbread House Build-Off, one of my favorite events of the year. Money raised goes to a program that helps women in need get on their feet, get some job skills, etc. Local pastry chefs and architects team up to design a gingerbread house to fit the year's theme. Here were a couple of the works in progress:

Meanwhile, kids can buy a gingerbread (graham cracker, actually) kit made by the women in the program, have a seat at a table and decorate their own little houses.

I hope you're enjoying the holidays, too.

The Santa situation, Thanksgiving costumes and more daily life

Oh, you guys who keep coming back to read Penny Carnival after these long breaks between posts are too good to me. Even J has been scolding me. 

I'm sorry for my absence. It's been, well, nuts.

Thanksgiving was lovely, though. How about you? 

We visited my family across the state and had a fun dinner at my sister's. The kids put on a "First Thanksgiving" play, dressed in costumes we made at the 11th hour (me, anyway).

Despite some historical inaccuracies (we're going to let that slide for a few years), it was downright adorable.

The play ended with the kids sharing a Thanksgiving feast of rice crispy treats shaped like corn on the cob and a blessing that led us to the dinner table.

 
You can read more about it on my Kids' Parties site.  

I did find time to make myself a pilgrim apron following Heather Bailey's fantastic Daily Spice pattern. I say pilgrim because it had a black bodice and skirt and a white waistband and ties. No pictures yet. I always seem to be behind the camera instead of in front of it.

The plan was to make four identical aprons--one for me, my mom, my sister and her friend who had dinner with us. But I only had time for one and it turned out a bit wonky (you know how it goes when you're using a pattern for the first time) so it's all mine. Maybe I'll try for a Santa style one for Christmas (red, black, red?) ... or maybe not.

Speaking of Santa, we're in the midst of our annual dilemma. J and I feel so strongly about being truthful with our kids. It's utterly painful for us to carry on with the Santa story. We do it, cheerfully, but this year is more challenging than ever because both girls have developed a phobia of the big guy. 

It seriously goes beyond a normal fear, especially for Bo, who is 4 now. I think Magpie (who is 2) gets scared because she sees her big sister crying. We tried to go to our city's annual tree lighting, but she wouldn't step foot in the building because she knew Santa would be there. The poor kid was hysterical.

We stayed in a hotel near Seattle last night in a city that throws a holiday parade--totally fun. Fake snow falling from the sky. Toy soldiers on stilts giving out candy canes. People dressed up like reindeer and snowmen and penguins. I don't even know if Santa was there because the girls didn't want to have anything to do with it. 

I take that back. Bo was happy to meet the Snow Princess. 

My mom was with us and she tried dancing the jitterbug with Rudolph to help the girls get comfortable with the costumes, but it didn't work (and then Rudolph's helper said to my mom, "OK, lady. Let's not get Rudolph too hot in there." If you know my mom, it was a classic Nancy moment.)

I kind of wonder if Bo is so scared because we're so honest with her about everything else. She's in the heart of those years when she's trying to figure out how the world works, and here are her parents telling her that some old guy is going to park his reindeer on her roof and shimmy down her chimney one night. I think I'd be freaked out, too.

I'm seriously considering telling her the truth and focusing on the historical story of Saint Nick, not to mention all the other wonderful Christmas traditions. But here is how the conversation usually goes when I suggest this:

Megan: I don't like being dishonest with my kids.
Friends and Family: When you were little, didn't you believe in Santa?
Megan: Yes.
Friends and Family: And it was fun, wasn't it?
Megan: Yes.
Friends and Family: Then why rob your children of some of the magic of Christmas?
Megan: Umm ... I don't know.

Plus, what if she told all the kids in preschool the truth about Santa. Would we get expelled??!

Advice please. There are four weeks until Christmas and at some point I'm going to need to go into a mall.

In other news, we made our first snowmen of the year:

But it's these snowmen I'm really craving:

(Photo taken at Madeleine's in Spokane) 

And if you're going to make a snowman, you might as well do it in style, right Magpie?

 

We enjoyed a recent playdate with a friend:

 

which resulted in these cookies:

and this sweet moment in Bo's bedroom:

Bo won her first coloring contest, which bought dinner for four so we're happy to report that she's now earning her keep:

And check out this adorable Princess and the Pea toy my nieces' grandmother made for them after seeing the idea here:


 Squeal! Don't you love the little pocket for the pea?

I'm sure she would want me to tell everyone that she didn't make the doll, but she's an accomplished seamstress so I know she could make any doll she wanted to.   

Now that your computer has crashed from opening all those photos ... come back soon because I'm working behind the scenes on lots of good stuff. Twelve--count 'em! twelve!--tutorials for Christmas crafts. That starts Dec. 6, but hopefully I'll have something worthwhile to say before then (but don't hold your breath). 

   

  

The Little Red Riding Hood birthday party

Hooray for another birthday party! Last night was Magpie's Little Red Riding Hood-themed 2nd birthday. These are getting more fun all the time--so many kids running around the house, so much excitement beforehand, so much more time for the grownups to catch up with each other now that the little ones are more self sufficient. 

Something always goes a little wrong, but that's part of the fun, right? Right?! 

Besides, the look on this face makes the mad scramble at the end worth it:

 

You can see more pictures/details on my About.com Kids' Parties site.

You might notice that she's clutching a couple of her birthday gifts there--a stuffed pig and a plastic giraffe. Almost every picture I took last night shows her with those two toys in her hands. I guess she took a liking to them right away.

She's also wearing another gift--this apron I sewed her (modeled by Lulu the lamb the other day so I didn't ruin the surprise):

 

I wish I'd had more time to make her some other handmade gifts. On my to-do list were a Mimi Kirchner doll (dressed as Little Red Riding Hood), a felt cake and a camping blanket, but time ran out. Oh, well. There's always Christmas.

Anyhoo, she was happy to get the apron, especially after having to borrow her big sister's for the last year or so. Magpie is an avid cook--I can't make anything without her "helping" these days--so I'm glad I got that project done for her.

Moving on ... to Christmas. 

I really don't see the point in decorating the house for Thanksgiving. I love Thanksgiving, but we're not going to be here for it, and why put the effort into decorating for Christmas if it's only up for a few weeks?

So we pulled out the crates labeled "Christmas" today and put a few things out. 

 

The big hit was the nativity set (the one I let them play with). You wouldn't believe the adventures Mary, Joseph and Jesus had today. My goodness. Did you know Mary is a princess? Yep. 

The best part, though, was that every time Bo would say something about "the baby Jesus," Magpie would look up and ask me for a "cheese stick." 

Halloween costumes 2009

Just a quick note to show the Halloween costumes I made for the girls.

Magpie was a pirate and Bo was Glenda the Good Witch ... for about three hours. Then she decided her costume was too scratchy so she put on the Cinderella dress I made for her birthday. Ay caramba. I did the same thing to my mom every year from about 1980 until 1985. Payback's a beeyatch! I would have gladly skipped the Thursday night wrestling match with three yards of tulle if she hadn't begged for it in the fabric store. Who's in charge here? Oh. These two are:

 

 

 

About to be blown away to Oz:

J and I dressed up, too, but he won't let me post the photo. (Every party has a pooper and he's the pooper of the party. I tell him that sometimes. Somehow it doesn't inspire him to be less of a party pooper. Did I tell you I am an awesome wife?!). Our costumes were very last minute. I bought us both Superman T-shirts and we wore them under white dress shirts with the buttons halfway undone. We also wore black-rimmed eye glasses. You get the picture. Clark Kent about to become Superman. I'll try harder next year.

The craft room has seen some serious action in the past week. Last night I frantically stitched up a pair of Montessori slippers for Magpie's first day at her big sister's school. Very exciting. I'd show you a picture, but the slippers hardly had time to be in existence before they were whisked away and put to use in the actual school this morning. 

And this week is all about preparing for Magpie's Little Red Riding Hood birthday party this weekend. Oh, and working. Not sure how it's all going to get done, but it always does. Details coming soon ... 

P.S. The pirate costume was Simplicity 3680 ... with some serious shortcuts. The Glenda dress was Simplicity 4139 ... with some serious tulle.

Birthday party planning and other tidbits

I'm knee deep in a work project right now. Did I say knee? I meant neck. It's time consuming but fun, and I'll tell y'all about in a few days.

Deadlines aren't what they used to be, though. When I worked full time for newspapers I used to thrive on knowing a story had to be filed by 9 p.m. After being wherever I had to be to cover the news, I'd have half the thing written in my head by the time I got back to my desk. And if I didn't, I was in trouble.

Everything changes with kids, though, especially when you work from home. Except when the girls are at preschool, there's never a guarantee that I'll have time to focus on what I'm doing and get it done by the time my editors need it. That uncertainty is more stressful than any breaking news ever was.

A phrase we seem to keep repeating around here is "It is what it is." In other words, quit complaining. Be grateful for the fascinating careers/assignments/life we have. Get it done. And move on. 

But here's a phrase I came across tonight--on Sarah Jane Studio's blog--that I like much better:

"Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved." -Thomas S. Manson

I wish that had been in my head last night as I was frantically trying to get the dishes done before bedtime while Magpie was crying and tugging on my leg, begging for my attention. Instead of turning off the water, parking my rear on the floor and loving her up, I scrubbed those pots clean like a madwoman ... and eventually let all the noise turn me into, well, a mad woman. 

Ridiculous. I'm not advocating being at kids' beck and call at all times (they need to learn patience, right?) but two minutes of quality time probably would have calmed her down and allowed me to finish the dishes in peace.

I read something once that said even if we do something we regret with our kids--even if it happened just a second ago--we have the option of changing our direction and taking a more positive route. In the next moment. Right then and there. Turn the corner. Don't look back. 

I don't know how that looks when your kids are older, but at 2 and 4, usually that means shifting gears from frustration to total silliness. Usually that comes naturally to me. Other times, the dishes win. Grrr ... moving on. 

I really just meant to pop on here to share a few tidbits:

-I'm getting a lot of hits right now on my pumpkin carving tutorial from last year. Just thought I'd post a link to it here to make it easier for newbies to find.

-Everybody and their brother also seems to want to bake an owl cake right now (based on Google searches that find their way to Penny Carnival). You can read about my adventures with owl cakes here and here.

-At some point, I'm going to have to start planning Magpie's second birthday party. The original idea was to make it a parade-themed party, which was inspired by these invitations I ordered. 

Aren't they adorable? They're even cuter in person, with their sweet little rounded corners and all.

But the weather has become downright frigid here, so I'm not sure I want to subject a bunch of kids to a late-October prance around the neighborhood. I think I'll save the invitations for Bo's July birthday, since she's the one who's been begging for a neighborhood parade anyway. A parade party could be so much fun--tell the kids to bring their bikes/strollers/wagons, have a stash of streamers and flags they can use to decorate their rides, do the parade thing (inviting neighbors to cheer them on), then come back to the house and serve a long, skinny cake that's frosted to look like a street. 

So I'm working on a Plan B now. Little Red Riding Hood birthday party? Three Little Bears? Alice in Wonderland tea party? Vintage circus? Hedgehogs? Mary Had a Little Lamb? OK, I need to have more kids so I can fulfill all my toddler birthday fantasies.
Update: I just want to acknowledge that I realize the birthday theme should be all about what the kid wants, but Magpie is at an age where everything is awesome to her. "Do you like moldy bread?" "I like mo-wee bed." "Do you like Brussel sprouts?" "I like bussybouts." 

Other things I'm loving right now:

-This idea for thank-you cards (just in time!)

-A work-in-progress by Anna Maria Horner. I will never get tired of rainbows.

-A lovely white dress

-and Art Nest Studio's (a.k.a. Susannah, the highly talented portrait artist) fawn softie pattern. Oooh ... another birthday theme possibility. Those could be the favors!